Kelis talks about her DIVORCE, FIRST BORN, AND FAME

The folks over at VIBE caught up with Kelis to conduct an interview for their comeback issue. She talked about her sticky divorce with rapper, Nas being a first-time mother, and life as a celebrity.

Your divorce was all over the blogosphere. How did you manage to not let the negativity affect you?
I have great friends and great family that are stellar . They are so amazing. Whether I ever sell another record or not, I have real friends and real family that stuck with me. They were like however you want to roll, we’ll roll. How do you want to do this? If you want to yell, we can yell. If you want to cry, we can cry. If you want to not think about it, we’re going to not think about it. I said ‘I don’t want to think about it.’ No one brought up anything at all. No one brought up blogs or anything.

Lets talk about your inspiration–your new son Knight. Where does his name come from?
I love that name. I thought I was having a girl. I had a whole plan. I was having a girl and I had bought pink ponies and shit. I was ready to rock and roll. I was like ‘I’m so in touch with myself.’ Obviously, I wasn’t. That was such a farce. So I only had two names for a boy: Knight and Sire. At the time, it would have been that he and I had the same initials, KJ. I just wanted a powerful and regal and majestic name for him.

Do you think having your first child during all of your turmoil with Nas helped you?
He really helped me get through everything. I could not let myself wild out and flip out and be emotional and depressed and sad and angry and all these things that naturally happen when you go through something like that. I am not going to let this little guy suffer because I’m in this situation. So I was so focused. My mourning period lasted about a week and then I was like ‘OK, I’ve got to pull this back together.’

How do you feel about “celebrity” and all that comes with being a “star”?
The thing is, music people think they’re the end all be all. Artists and people who are musicians, forget that there’s a whole world of folks out there that don’t give a crap about what you do. I’ve been doing this since I was 17, professionally, and I thought I couldn’t do it anymore. I hate the business of music. I don’t enjoy it at all. I needed a life change. I don’t need to be famous. I don’t feel like I’m public property. Even when I was married to another public figure, I fell like I’m very honest, I’m very polite. There are days that I want to take pictures and then there are days, when I’m like, ‘I love you babe, I appreciate you, but I don’t want to take a picture. I’m human. I’m not obnoxious about it. But you taking a picture of me without asking me is super rude. People do that all the time. I don’t want to be a pop star. I just want to make music that I want to make, enjoy it, love it and still go to the movies.

How did being pregnant and now being a mom change your outlook on life?
When I was pregnant I got into an argument with someone. I said ‘you have to realize, nothing you’ll ever do, ever, like for the rest of your life, will mean as much as what I’m doing now. You can win the Pulitzer prize , fucking Noble Peace Prize, and it wont even be a speck in what I’m creating. Do you know what that means?’ Half of the world can do this. That’s how I felt. I really felt like do you know how awesome I am? I’m literally making life right now. That resonated for me everyday. I was reading all these books and I joke with my baby now and I laugh and I’m like you’re made of pizza and bagels and all the good stuff in the world. I was not the perfect candidate for motherhood. But I’m like I can’t believe I made this creature, but I’m so in love.

So why natural childbirth?
I thought with all this crap, if I can do this, I’m invincible. I can do anything. I did no meds at all. They tried to give me morphine, but it was too late. I looked like hell, heinous. But I got through it. It was a very I-am-woman-hear-me-roar moment. That was some painful shit. I’ll never do it again, though.